Sunday, February 17, 2008

I don't think he's thought this through....

because if he had, he'd know that moving in with his mistress for "financial reasons" is not a good plan. By lying to me, by leading me on, not smart - he gave up any chance of any reconciliation, and he's going to find out that he's going to be worse off when he starts paying me child support and for the girls' insurance (because that's the standard agreement - a percentage of his income as well as all medical bills and premiums). Since he'll never be able to find any insurance for the girls for cheaper (especially good insurance), it makes sense to leave it under my insurance and he can just pay me for what comes out of my check. But he's not thinking straight. He's consumed with her and with guilt toward me. He keeps asking how I'm doing (apparently, I've seemed kind of "blah" lately. Really? Maybe that's because I don't feel the need to confide in an asshole who can lie to my face. Just a thought. See - I knew that anger/bitterness phase would kick in. I got the book on how to do my own divorce from the library (including the disk which has all the necessary forms on it). I'm willing to do this without lawyers if he's more agreeable to that (which I'm sure he is since it's waaaaaaaaay cheaper). But I'm going to be the one writing it up, so it's going to be what I want (and I like to think I can be fair). Don't worry, though, if he decides to get lawyers involved, my uncle is an attorney, so I have someone I can turn to if it goes that way. I'm getting to the point where I am ready to get this over with. I want it all done and worked out, so that I can start saving my money (which he's leaving alone - it's a joint account). The only thing that remains to be seen is child care for the girls. I am a little worried about it. I like to think that his mom will realize it's what's best for the girls, but still. That's the only thing I'm really worried about. Thank God that I'm at a point in my life where I can pay for things on my own. I don't have a mortgage. I don't live beyond my means. And if worst came to worst, I could even pay for childcare for the girls (the little things like the internet and satellite would have to go, but it could be done).

2 comments:

learp17 said...

Oh my goodness, what a tough situation. I am so sorry you have to deal with this. I can imagine that you know you're going to be OK but worrying about your girls is the hard part. But you are a great mom, and the fact that they are first in your mind is testament to that. Good luck, keep posting. I'm thinking of you.

Sabrina said...

I haven't been on here for awhile but I see things with him aren't too different. I'm so sorry you are having to go through this. Huge hugs!